By Frank Asch
There’s a gorilla sitting in my car. He’s playing with the radio. First he listens to classical music. He closes his eyes and seems to drift off into a dream. Then his eyes flash wide open and he turns on the news. He hears about violence in Africa and tears stream down his face. Where the tears fall tiny green plants start to grow on the seat and on the floor. In just a few minutes the car is choked with vines and flowers and big leafy green plants. The gorilla just grins and turns back to the classical music.
The Gorilla and the Butterfly
By Gary Lindorff
I saw that gorilla. He was playing a saxophone at the pub and taking requests, but all he could play was “Oh, Mary, don’t you weep”. Everyone kept shouting out their favorite songs anyway, until a butterfly flew out of the mirror behind the bar shouting “QUIET!”, to everyone’s alarm. The gorilla and the butterfly then vanished into the mirror, the butterfly shouting “QUIET! QUIET! QUIET!”, which became “TEIUQ! TEIUQ! TEIUQ!” as they passed inside. A drunk shouted, “They’re gone!” And that was true. As they merged with their reflections, the two sets of gorilla and butterfly canceled each other out ! Then it was as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. The mounted moose head resumed spitting at the customers and the bartender continued pouring whiskey on the heads of every sunflower that was even slightly drooping, shouting angrily, “NO DRUNKEN FLOWERS ALLOWED! NO DRUNKEN FLOWERS!”